The Moose Method
Humor
The funny side of relationships
The Day the Penis Asked for a Raise
The Day the Penis Asked for a Raise
I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons: I do physical labor. I work at great depths. I plunge headfirst into everything I do. I do not get weekends or public holidays off. I work in a damp environment. I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation. I work in high temperatures. My work exposes me to contagious diseases.
Sincerely, P. Niss
The Response
Dear Penis: After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration re jects your request for the following reasons: You do More >
How to Please a Women
How to please a woman:
Love her
Die for her
Take her to dinner
Miss the game for her
Buy her Jewerly
Be interested in
what she has to say..
How to please a man:
Show up naked.
Bring a beer
Men Are Just Happier People
NICKNAMES
· If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.
· If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Dickhead and Shit for Brains.
EATING OUT
· When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it’s only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.
· When the girls get their bill, out come More >
How TO Make a Woman Happy
It’s not difficult to make a woman happy. A man only needs to be:
1. a friend
2. a companion
3. a lover
4. a brother
5. a father
6. a master
7. a chef
8. an electrician
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a decorator
13. a stylist
14. a sexologist
15. a gynecologist
16. a psychologist
17. a pest exterminator
18. a psychiatrist
19. a healer
20. a good listener
21 an organizer
22. a good father
23. very clean
24. sympathetic
25. athletic
26. warm
27. attentive
28. gallant
29. intelligent
30. funny More >
Rules That Men Wished Women Knew
1. If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us. 2. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it’s up, put it down. 3. Don’t cut your hair. Ever. 4. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if he can find the perfect present! 5. If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, expect an answer you don’t want to hear. 6. Sometimes, he’s not thinking about you. Live with it. 7. Don’t ask him what he’s thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation, More >
